Friday, November 20, 2015


I am an american. I was born in california.  I was educated by curriculum approved by America.  I'm given foods that are deemed healthy to consume by America.  I'm taught basic civil rights, morals and ethics by the standards of America.  I'm told who are my allies and what countries are good by America.  I'm given a right to vote on things that are allowed to be voted on by America.  Everything in my life has been influenced by America.  The land of the free and home of the brave. I root for my country in the olympics and like many American Made people blindly thought my government, America, cared about me and everything I was taught had to be correct, It's America and I am an American but I am not a sheep. 

I have friends and acquaintances in other countries who share the anti American propaganda that is spread through out the world. Then I watch videos like the one I'm going to link below and my mind continues to be blown and my heart breaks for the love of my country. 

I recommend you watch this video. It very informative about Americas international affairs and war. It explains how Isis came to exist.

These are a few things that make me question everything I was ever taught by america: 

How was Aspartame declared a poison by the FDA, then after a miraculous study Searle paid to have done by Monsanto, it became legal?  Why does our government allow us to continue to eat it.  It's like 100% poisonous and in almost everything you eat.  It's a fact it causes tumors.  Cancer is one of America's biggest earners.  Why aren't they removing anything from our food that is known to cause illness but instead creating industry on the illnesses.  Money.

Why did we sell arms to Iraq and train ISIS?  Why did we leave American War Weapons in Afghanistan for anyone to take after we ended the war.  Why do we always step in to aid other countries.  We tear down their country's infrastructure and can't rebuild their government because it always ends up being corrupt.  Probably because they don't have Americans slaving to support that government,  because America destroyed most of their marketplaces.  Money

The more I learn about the international affairs of America, the more I understand why when I travel abroad, I'm judged as an elitist american.  We are judged by the actions of our government which if you truly study our behavior on books other than American recounts of war and history, you'll realize we do come from our roots.  Christopher Columbus should be celebrated because he did what America does and clearly stands for.  We see opportunity to capitalize and we go, conquer and take.   All of the terrorist situations that we find ourselves in can not be blamed on just one political party but the entire government. 

The more I learn the more I've realized that the parties were created to make the common folk living the American Dream, have a divide. We now judge people based on their political party affiliation and nothing else. I know people who won't hesitant to reduce someone to nothing on the fact they're a republican or a democrat.  What people seem to forget is that we are all American and the divide of political parties and hate is creating the perfect distraction so both parties can do whatever they want from up there while we are hating each other, as we work our asses off to support complete political corruption. It's not one party it's the entire government and its systems. The greed in politics and false hopes given to the American people by leaders who don't care because they're actually living the American Dream with salaries and other gifts that we the people work hard to provide them. 
So, when we hate each other over the  political parties in my mind it's like they're both the same exact thing and neither of them have anyone in office who cares about the American people beyond their own pockets and desired aquilades. 
Your political opinions and involvement needs to start at the local level because that's the only politics worth discussing because it's the only place your opinion will matter to eventually see the changes in federal government we need. 
I haven't really figured it all out with regards to how to change the corruption of the American government and international affairs but I do know that if we can love each other instead of letting the words democrat and republican define us and start binding together maybe just maybe we can bask in the glow of our pride of just being Americans... United we can stand, as one nation. Under the sun!  You know cause the sun creates sunshine and love not hate and war! Peace! 

Family. Holidays.

Growing up I dreamed of a closeness to family and had a belief in loyalty to those I was related to. As a child I had a very hard time understanding the dynamics of my family and the way that my family members behaved towards each other. Everyone spoke so horribly about everyone behind their backs and then face to face it was like nothing was said. My aunt would scream at my mom and kick us out of her house. She would say things to me as a young child based on her jealously of my mother. Almost begrudging, me, a little girl of the luxuries she was afforded by being born to the right parents. Her husband didn't work as hard as my dad, I thought as a kid so what's her problem? Work harder then.   

My moms parents had 5 grandchildren and they favored the other 4. To my grandmother I was the fat granddaughter she continually needed to remind.  My aunt turned my grandparents against my mom by saying she flaunted her lifestyle in her face and she needed them more So, they rarely stayed at our house when they would come to LA for the summer . My other grandma was so cheap that she resented my parents wealth and felt entitled. I never had a grandparent come for grandparents day. I always had the negative things being said behind everyone's back in my head. I had a room next to my parents office growing up so I really heard all sides of the stories.  It's hard to bond with people who are so fake to each other. I tried to be a good cousin to all my cousins and brothers but none of them know what loyalty or thoughtfulness means. They do know what gossip is and they all took the first chance they could to bash me to each other and to others.  This is not how family behaves. At 13 I discovered playing sick and would try to be sick  around the time of any family function.  Especially those at my aunts house, where not only the food was gross but so was the environment. This weird fakeness and underlying tone of distain and jealousy was overwhelming. 

It took many years of silence of family secrets and bullshit until one Passover. The Passover that finally set me free. I had just walked in after braving the 101 traffic for 2 hours from work and stopping to pick up stuff for my mom. My hands were over full trying to carry everything in with one trip and before I could put anything down my bitter aunt says in her awful NY judging voice, "you could say hello to us like a mensch?"  (Mensch is a Yiddish word for good person) This coming from a lady who is hiding that she ever had a first marriage and told me to email her daughters as a good older cousin, to no response from either girl. So here she is implying I'm not a good person because I wanted to put my stuff down without saying hi first and take a minute to do so. "I responded with, oh like your daughters who can't answer an email?"  Her response was "well maybe there's a good reason people don't write you back, Amy!"

What!?  That was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. 23 years of this horrible, purposefully jabbing, hateful, jealous person who was always the victim. She knows everything and is perfect. Well, I told her off via email and included how if she was so perfect then why never mention her divorce to anyone and hide it. I let her know what everyone thought but nobody would say to her face and cc'd my entire family. Enough was enough and I have never put myself in a position to be abused by her or anyone in her terrible family again. 

Life is about happiness and the people who bring love to your life. Who build you up and are happy for you no matter what. I didn't find that with my natural blood relatives, including my brothers. It's how my family is at its core that I've struggled to understand since childhood. I love my parents, have a wonderful connection to my uncle and have a few distant cousins I love but that's where it ends for me with my blood family. And it's perfectly ok. 

I spend my holidays not in forced situations with people I have no connection with or love for but with people who are my family. Every occasion has been filled with love and joy since the day I took a stand and said fuck off, I'll be spending my holidays with people who really want to be my family because we treat each other like family should. Choose happiness over unnecessary obligation and be really thankful for your real family!

There's a reason these are my most used words on Facebook.... I've made it this way! 

Thursday, November 19, 2015

Slamming Cait Jenner for receiving women's awards.

So we're comparing struggles for validation now. We are individuals living our lives, no ones struggles are more important than the next. Just different. Embrace diversity and award courage without a gender, sexual orientation or race; For we are all just human. Hate creates hate and love creates change. Be love.  

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Traveling in recovery

It's 4 am and my legs are twitching. I just got back from a trip to be a bridesmaid in my friends wedding.  Going to Denver I knew I was going to swell when I got there. Immediately when I landed I get Epsom salt so I can soak and try to reduce the swelling. I also bring compression stalkings and neoprene compression thigh wraps. The reason my legs are spasming is because they're definitely not use to walking unassisted for far lengths. Going there I used the wheelchair assistance to save myself a little bit of added stress on my hip. I kept my diet as normal as possible through the first day up until the evening of the wedding and was back on my game the next morning.  You have to live a little and eat, drink, be merry and celebrate! That cake though. Processed sugar. Yum. Sugar wasted.  Anyways. 
   In order to succeed at holistic nutrition, you must start thinking ahead. Holistic nutrition is the principle that food is your medicine. It's preventative medicine and purposed medicine.  To prepare myself to travel I add a little extra vitamin d supplement for added tendon support. I'm still healing.  I eat a lot more pineapple to try to keep my swelling down even more. I also drink an anti inflammatory green juice of cucumber, celery, spinach, pineapple, ginger, lemon and cayenne pepper. It's also very important to do all your stretches and physical therapy even on your own and to ice and soak after. The more diligent you are the better it is for your recovery. 
This trip I had an early flight so I was in bed by 8 pm and up by 4 am to work out. Knowing you're going to be sitting or standing for long periods of time means it's even more important to get in your work out.
I then pump up the amount of turmeric in my morning latte (cold brewed coffee, hot water, turmeric, cinnamon, honey) and I also add two turmeric capsules and already have some packed to bring with me. I had palmetto (citrus) for breakfast to boost my immunity from all the germs I'm about to encounter at the airport. Knowing I'll be hungry again before my flight, I bring with me a meal and a snack. The worst is being hungry with no options at the airport. At least no options that will contribute to my optimum health.   The one thing I've learned through my recovery is; it never hurts to ask. At the hotel they had a fruit buffet. They only had a little pineapple out. I need a lot. So I asked if there was any way I could get a plate of pineapple. I briefly cover its for my swelling and with a smile she returns with a huge plate. So instead of just settling for the unhealthy, if you ask for your health you'll receive. 
Although it may seem time consuming to do everything this way. I can assure you the end results are much better than if you take pills to mask your symptoms. Our goal is to heal and sadly you have to feel to achieve that. 
After traveling and enjoying a night of naughty food, instead of going straight back to my normal nutrition I feel the need to cleanse and boost my metabolism. The processed foods and the sodium feels like it halts my system because plain and simple. It does. I have a notion, a theory for nutrition I'm trying to work out. My instinct nutritionally is to go really high protein for a few days and then switch to intermittent fasting. Where you have 5 juices with a handful of something, (nuts, coconut shreds), in a day and one big meal, high protein/low carb (protein/veggies) at 4pm.  After a few days you go back to the normal fruit and raw til 4 and high carbs low fat or high protein low carb for dinner. The notion of using fad diet principles but for short courses to reboot reset and relieve your symptoms after you travel, splurge or in preparation for life events. Every time I travel, I try to fine tune this on my return. I'll report back. As of right now, my right hip has very minimal swelling while my left hip has increased swelling. I'm very stiff and spasms are a plenty but I don't feel sluggish. I think I'm on to something. Guess it's time for a soak. 

Breakfast buffet choices of champions. 

And that concludes your 4am nutrition ramble. 

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

"Eat Well Live Well: Transitioning to an Unprocessed Lifestyle" by Amy Michelle is available on Amazon for Kindle and Itunes!

Through my experiences in life I have found the path with my nutrition that is leading me to create a lifestyle that I can "live" with.  My journey is not complete and I have a long way to go but I know I'm headed in the right direction:

A note from the Author: 

"After succeeding to achieve my “dream body” by having every eating disorder, going from fad diet to fad diet, “clean eating" and over training, it wasn't until I was struck by a car while riding my bike, that my real nutrition journey began. The physical disabilities and internal affects of the accident left me unable to rely on my old habits and tricks of the fitness world. As I slowly learned the affects that the foods I was eating and drinking had on my mobility, inflammation, mental well being and all around general health, I started to really learn how to eat to feed my body for optimum health. Once I learned how to eat properly, my body started to reshape itself and I could no longer deny what I already knew, everything I ever learned about fitness, nutrition and health was not correct. This lifestyle will teach you how to eat and feed your body so that 80% of your food is for your health and 20% is to fully enjoy all the pleasures this world has for your palette, guilt free. By learning how to eat instead of following a rigid “diet” , we take control over our decisions and put our health back into our own hands, without any excuses except you want to live a long and healthy life. You can’t control everything around you but you can control what you eat, your health and your lifestyle!” 

Amy Michelle 
Live Well ~ Love Much~Laugh Often

The book is available at the links below



Saturday, November 7, 2015

Mental Health

Since the day of my accident I have not felt comfortable in my own skin and I don't mean that in a self esteem body issue type way. I mean my body hurts always and I can't ever just sit still and be. I have nerves that are dead and some that are overworking. Nerves healing, bones healing and crazy other connectivity issues. Part of it was because I saw the car coming down on me in the split second before she hit me so my body tensed. I constantly have to move around because the stillness just isn't possible. The symptoms are always there. My hands are numb and my feet are always freezing and my spine feels like a metal rod that's just constantly throbbing. Through all of this there have been times that I've wanted to end it. The thought of living like this forever which, reality is saying it's so, could drive someone into the depths of mental hell. 
This is one of the main reasons why I won't give in to taking all the pills they push on me and why I continue to work out in any way that supports my capabilities and disabilities. I eat to support not only my physical health but my mental health. 
 I've had two episodes where I went into a two day whoa is me desperation and wouldn't leave the couch. My parents couldn't recognize their daughter nor feel her pain but I saw theirs. The anguish in seeing their daughter in so much pain that life didn't serve purpose, this fight seemed never ending. 
It was the look in their eyes that fueled me to dig deeper within myself to see that I knew I controlled my happiness and I was letting the pain win. 
As I lay her today typing this my hands are numb, my left foot is burning, hip is in spasm and my neck is just, we won't go there but, I'm the happiest I've ever been mentally. In spite of it all. 
I've shed all the toxic family and people who don't add joy to my life.  I try my hardest to look at the positive in every situation and have created a perspective that produces happiness. As each thing comes my way, I have an understanding of the importance of the little things and I appreciate the small victories in life with an elevated sense of gratitude. In essence I turned my frown upside down and researched ways I could change my brain. I didn't want to depend on a pill to just make me "feel" better. I wanted to be better and make the changes I needed that would stay with me. If I have to walk with a crutch I certainly wasn't going to use one for my mental health. I want off crutches in every sense of the word so that I can be free and evolve as a person beyond my wildest dreams.  The world is a place bigger then our own minds and if we don't expand our own minds we won't evolve as a race. 
I'm proud to talk about my mental issues because we all have them and we could definetly use a fresh breath of honesty with our shortcomings so we get better  instead of delusions of grandeur.
  A little moment of love goes a long way. Find love and happiness in everything you do. It's there if you're looking for it. 

Wednesday, November 4, 2015

You have to try Kiwi Berries

Not only are these little gems delicious but here's why they are so nutritious. 

  • Like other “superfood” berries, kiwi berries have an unusually high level of antioxidants that protect your body from toxins and oxidation that can lead to cancer and other serious diseases.
  • With about five times as much vitamin C as your average orange, kiwi berries provide an immune system boost. Vitamin C is also considered a powerful antioxidant.
  • Kiwi berries are a rich source of vitamin E, which helps maintain healthy levels of cholesterol and heart health. The plus side is, you can get as much vitamin E from a just a few low-calorie kiwi berries as you can from an entire avocado.
  • Along with spinach, kiwi berries are one of the rare vegetables rich in Vitamin B6, which helps your body create and use energy.
  • Other nutrients in kiwi berries include folic acid, fiber, potassium and chromium, making them a good food to help maintain regular digestion, energy production, nervous system function and kidney health.